What is there to say about food, really? It's delicious and, some may argue, a precondition for living!
I have a bit of a complicated relationship with food. For starters, I can't cook it to save my life. I mean, I've cooked rice that required nothing but to be left covered on the stove to boil for several minutes, and I managed to mess that up. It's not necessarily that I don't enjoy cooking occasionally, but I tend to get impatient with the whole process. The fewer the steps, the better. Also, I tend to get confused if too many ingredients are involved.
At the same time, I love rich tastes, especially spicy and sweet. Salty's good too. It's why I'm so drawn to asian and south-asian cuisine. It's such an unfamiliar mix of flavours and spices. It's not that I don't enjoy traditional Bulgarian cuisine, which is generally light on spices (according to my tastes, at least), but it's a completely different feel. While Bulgarian food is comforting and familiar, foreign food is tantalising and new, something to be explored and experienced. It's like the difference between spending the summer in Sofia, visiting the extended family and refamiliarizing myself with the Homeland, and vacationing in a new spot, getting to know a culture and atmosphere completely unknown to me. They're both great, but the experience is completely different.
And god, don't get me started on the textures! Crispy, crunchy, soft, creamy, dry, buttery, noodly, liquid, juicy, thick, fluffy, flaky, melty, powdery, moist, crumbly, chewy, milky and all the combinations therein. Mmmmmm....Of course, my issue has always been how picky I am with food. There are certain things that I simply will not eat. For example, cooked peppers. Don't get me wrong, I'll eat them when they're raw, but baked/fried/whatever peppers are a huge no-no. Same with tomatoes. I don't do oil and vinegar in my salad and I'm not too crazy about cabbage (unless it's in a salad). Bananas and eggs can only be consumed under a very narrow set of conditions. I could go on.
I'm also diabetic. Type 1, I've had it since I was five. It definitely makes it hard to eat whatever I want, whenever I want. I need to follow a fairly rigid eating schedule. I've recently started using a new type of insulin that gives me more flexibility, but every once in a while, I'll end up with a hypoglycemia when I'm anything but hungry and I'll be forced to eat something, or I'll be starving, but without my insulin, so I'll have to choose between staying hungry, or facing the unfortunate side-effects of high blood-glucose levels. I also need to balance my insulin intake and my food consumption very carefully. Usually, it involves a lot of guess-work. How many units should I take if I want that sandwich and my current glucose level is 11.8, for example? This all adds a whole new layer of importance to eating for me. I can't just say "I'm not eating anything today," but I also can't just go around eating anything I want without at least a minimum amount of planning ahead of time.
Another problem I have is with my appetite. If I'm under stress (exams, essays, whatever), I might be starving, but at least 8 times out of 10 I'll feel sick at the thought of eating anything. Not only that, but I'll put eating off in order to get whatever I'm doing done as soon as possible. Then stress is over and appetite comes back. With a vengence. I'm just going through such a period right now. I'm constantly thinking of food, of what I'll eat next, even as I'm eating what I'm currently eating (no, miraculously I haven't been gaining weight). And what I'm finding most often is that it's not so much the hunger making me want to eat, as the appetite -- the desire to experience all those rich, unfamiliar, exciting flavours and textures of food. What I'm craving isn't light snacks, but rich, decadent, strongly-flavoured, foreign meals.
It's the newness and excitement of it all. I need thrill and movement in my life, whether it's in the form of work, people, or something else. The school-year is nearly over, so my workload has lightened and I'm not really meeting any new people. I'm not going anywhere until this summer. So, I'm exploring food for the time being. I try not to overdo it, of course. Not only can my wallet not handle constant eating, but I think overconsumption is a pretty shitty thing to do in a world where the majority of people can't feed themselves adequately. Plus, there are obviously better ways to get out of a rut. But I'm also not going to let myself be ashamed of the fact that I love eating. It's part of the human experience and I want in!
